Miss Daylee Hitnmiss

Miss Daylee Hitnmiss was
Maybe This'es little sis.
She had one blue eye the other was green,
the strangest ears you've ever seen.

Both her ears, they were quite small,
but on top of one there was a round ball,
an earring, to those who have got'em,
on the other ear twas at the bottom.

Her clothes looked like she'd bought them all used,
her wrinkled print dress and two left shoes
brought much attention to her stockings,
which on review appeared quite shocking.

One was white
the other red
they matched the large hat
she had on her head.

That hat itself was quite a sight
twas not unlike a Chinese kite,
with corners sticking here and there
and little lights most everywhere.

Her coat was green with polka-dots,
like a field of grass with yellow spots.
Her dress was blue, her shoes were puce,
her scarf was always coming loose.

But in the family of Hitnmiss
there was no one like this little sis',
for at Christmas time she would you see
double as the Holiday tree.

Explaining Yourself

With that winsome smile
which hints at total understanding,
she left me alone.
I thought my explanation
was quite good,
if not uniquely original.
It might have dragged on,
ever so little,
and become just the slightest bit boring,
but that is no reason
for a total lack of
human understanding.
And what does she mean,
"far fetched?"
Every word of that explanation
can be found
in the dictionary.
It just so happens
that I choose to
put them in an order
which, to her,
seems not within
fetching distance.

Eloquence

Sometimes I get syntactical,

until I've got a tummyful,

then I look around a bit,

See my error then I quit.

Toulouse-Lautrec

There once was a Touluse named Lautrec
whose shortness you soon could detect,
to what others would be a pain in the knee
to Tauluse was a pain in the neck.

(Paul Brandvik)

Billy MaGee

I once knew a man
named Billy MaGee.
A fine looking lad
and as short as could be.

He hadn't a child
or a wife or a home,
for all of his life
he did nothing but roam.

He'd been as far north
as constitution could stand,
he'd gone far down south
got warm and got tanned.

He'd gone to the east
he'd gone to the west
there wasn't a place
that was left on his quest.

So he sat still
and started in thinkin'
that all of the people
he'd seen had been linkin',

their nose to their heads
in a strang sort of fashion
on top of their faces,
he called it "eye lashin."

Anne Wanda Twormore's Special Thing

Ann Wanda Twormore
Had always been looking for
Just the right thing
To place by her front door.

And though she’d found many,
None costing a penny,
For that special place
She didn’t like any.

She’d tried them all out
From the tall to the stout
And finally decided
She couldn’t do without.

So, as quick as an elf,
She took from the shelf
All of her things
And made one herself.

1981

Miss Tore

Janet Tore
Became awfully sore,
When day after day
She’d head out the door, and
Her mother would tell her
Time and again
“Please do not dawdle
And be home by ten.”

But Janet,
Whose mind was likely to wander,
Was one of a kind
For there were none who were fonder
Of a leisurely stroll,
For exercise sake,
With the statue
That stood in the park by the lake.

There was seldom a day
She would miss her preamble,
Keeping time by dear Janet
Was never a gamble,
But alas as she visited
Day after day
Her old friend, the statue,
Had nothing to say.

She would ask him,
And quiz him, and interrogate plenty,
But for all of her questions,
He answered not any.
He’d just stand there
And smile with a bird on his head
And listen intently
To all that she said.

1981

Marvin Maroon (a trip to the Moon)

Marvin Maroon
Took a trip to the moon,
Told all his friends
He would be back by noon.
He packed all this things
In a large carpet bag
Had so much stuff,
It made his back sag.

When he arrived,.
After such a long drive,
He was somewhat dismayed
To find no one alive.
But then from in back
Of some dust covered hills
Came a little old man
In a sign , said “EAT BILL’S”

He pointed the way,
A short little walk
In back of a dune
Where they both could talk,
And cupping his hands
In a secretive way
Said, “You’re the first person
That I’ve seen today.”

And then as he turned
And started to leave
A thought from his head
He seemed to retrieve.
To Marvin Maroon
Who stood there in wonder
Said, “I think that you
Might have made a small blunder.”

“if you’ve come to be
The man on the moon
You have arrived
Way, way, way much two soon.
I don’t retire
Till a hundred and three
And till then the man ]
On the moon is just me.”


1981